"Remember when we...?"; Why Sharing Memories is Soul Food

Christmas Memories (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

by Amanda Barnier and Penny Van Bergen, The Conversation: http://theconversation.com/remember-when-we-why-sharing-memories-is-soul-food-35542

Families and friends share memories all the time; “You’ll never guess …”, “How was your day?”, and “Do you remember when …” are rich daily fodder.

Sharing memories is not only a good way to debrief and reminisce, we’re beginning to realise the process plays an important role in children’s psychological development and protects our memories as we advance in age.

Telling stories draws us together

We share memories of the past for many reasons. By telling a sad or difficult story - perhaps a fond memory of someone we have lost since last Christmas - we strengthen shared connections, offer sympathy and elicit support.

By telling a funny or embarrassing story - perhaps the time the dog stole the Christmas ham - we share feelings of joy or recognition of difficulties overcome, large or small. By sharing similar or not-so-similar experiences, we empathise with and understand one another better.

Talking about the past also helps create and maintain our individual and shared identities. We know who we are - whether as individuals, groups or communities - because our memories provide a database of evidence for events we have experienced and what they mean to us.

Even when some people missed out on an event, sharing a memory of it can shape their identity. Developmental psychologist Robyn Fivush and her team demonstrated this when they asked American adolescents to recount “intergenerational” stories: events from their parents’ lives they learnt via memories shared within the family, often around the dinner table.

Fivush found that the adolescents she tested could easily retell many of their parents’ memory stories. Most importantly, they made strong connections between these second-hand family memories and their own developing sense of identity: “my dad played soccer when he was young, so that got me started”.

Children who showed these kinds of family memory-self identity connections reported higher levels of well-being.

Teaching children how to remember

For young children, telling memory stories teaches them how to remember. From as young as two years of age children begin to show signs of autobiographical memory: memories of themselves and their lives.

Although these earliest memories often are fleeting (it is not until our third or fourth birthday that we start forming memories that last into adulthood), they are important because they show that children are learning how to be a rememberer.

Research by developmental psychologists consistently shows that the way parents and others talk to young children about the past is crucial for their memory development.

One of the best ways is to use what we call a “high elaborative” style. This involves prompting the child’s own contributions with open-ended questions (who, what, why, how) and extending on and adding structure to the child’s sometimes limited responses. Together, the parent and child can then jointly tell a memory story that is rich, full and comprehensible.

Children whose parents use this elaborative reminiscing style subsequently show stronger and more detailed memories. sean dreilinger/Flickr, CC BY-NC-SA

Consider this example from one of our studies where a mother and her four-year-old son reminisce about a favourite Christmas ritual:

Mother: … and you and Daddy put the Christmas tree up together, and then you put on decorations! What decorations did you put on?
Child: Um … the Christmas balls!
Mother: That’s right! Daddy bought Christmas balls and stars to hang on the tree. What colours were they?
Child: Red and gold.
Mother: Red and gold. Pretty red balls, and gold stars.
Child: And there was the paper circles too.

Notice how the mother guides the progress of her son’s recollections. She is mindful too of letting him contribute as much as he is able, scaffolding his memories with appropriate, open-ended and informative cues. She also reinforces and praises his contributions.

Not surprisingly, children whose parents use this elaborative reminiscing style subsequently show stronger and more detailed memories of their own past experiences.

Preschool children who are exposed to this style of reminiscing also develop stronger comprehension, vocabulary and literacy skills. And because we tend to remember and talk about emotionally meaningful events - events that make us happy, sad, scared - elaborative reminiscing helps children understand and learn to navigate difficult emotions and emotional memories.

These early practices have long-term consequences. Older children whose families narrate and discuss emotion-rich stories around the dinner table report higher levels of self-esteem and show greater resilience when faced with adversity.

It’s fine to disagree

Conversations about the past often require some degree of negotiation. Many studies highlight the value of collaborating in recall. That is, giving everyone a voice rather than letting one narrator dominate; particularly one voice that narrates other people’s memories as well as their own.

But what if someone seems to be telling the memory wrong? You’ve probably experienced the frustration of a brother, sister or cousin down the other end of the Christmas table mixing up the details of an event you both experienced. Or worse yet, claiming and recalling a childhood experience that you know happened to you and not to them.

It’s fine to disagree so long as everyone gets a voice. Evgeni Zotov/Flickr, CC BY-NC-ND

With young children still learning to remember, contradicting or ignoring their memory contributions - even if they contain source errors or inaccuracies - can shut the conversation down and discourage joint remembering.

But as we get older, we realise that others may have a different perspective on events. We realise that 100% accuracy is not the only or even the most important goal of remembering. As adults, disagreements about the past may in fact be a sign of a robust remembering system.

Scaffolding memory as we age

Sharing memories may also “scaffold” or support memory as we age. In a study just published, we first asked older adult couples (aged 60 to 88 years old) to individually remember various events experienced with their spouse over the past five years. All had been married for over 50 years, making them long-term, intimate life and memory partners.

One week later, we asked half of the couples to talk in detail with their spouse about their events and half to talk in detail with just the experimenter.

Compared with young adults, older adults working alone typically find it difficult to recall autobiographical memories in great detail. But when our older couples remembered with their spouse their memory stories were more detailed than the stories of couples who remembered alone.

Although collaboration did not lead young couples (aged 26 to 42 years old) to remember more, those who reported closer relationships with their spouse tended to recall more details of events shared with that spouse, even when they remembered alone. In other words, at this earlier stage of life, shared experiences and memories might primarily be serving intimacy and identity goals.

For older couples who have invested in strong, intimate relationships, they increasingly might need and look for external memory scaffolding as their internal memory abilities decline. These older couples may then start to reap the cognitive benefits of what they sowed with their partner, families and friends in a long life of living and remembering together.

If you have no immediate kin close by or close, do not despair. This research shows that it is how we talk about the past with loved ones that counts, not simply the biology of who we talk to. So this Christmas, come together with your “families”, whoever they are, and share one of the greatest, uniquely human, gifts of all: the gift of memory stories.


This article was originally published on The Conversation. Read the original article.

Walking: The Secret Ingredient for Health, Wealth, and More Exciting Neighborhoods

Photo: Shutterstock

by Jay Walljasper, Yes! magazine: http://www.yesmagazine.org/happiness/walking-is-going-places

Walking is going places. Over recent decades, walking has come to be widely viewed as a slow, tiresome, old-fashioned way to get around.

But that’s changing now as Americans recognize that traveling by foot can be a health breakthrough, an economic catalyst, and the route to happiness.

Is walking the next big thing?

Look to the media to give you an answer. Popular lifestyle magazine Real Simple declared it “America’s Untrendiest Trend” on its February cover. A month later Builder, a construction trade journal, announced something similar on its cover: “Walkability. Why We Care … and Why You Should Too.”

A new book called A Philosophy of Walking, reviewed in The New Yorker, asserts that walking “makes it possible to recover the pure sensation of being, to rediscover the simple joy of existing.”

And one of the year’s top music videos, “Happy” by soul singer Pharrell Williams, shows all kinds of people strutting, stepping, striding, and sashaying down city streets. It’s an exuberant celebration of walking and has been viewed more than 500 million times on YouTube.

There is sure to be continuing coverage of foot power next year when the Surgeon General’s office releases a Call to Action on the health and social benefits of walking and walkable communities - a step some are comparing to the 1964 Surgeon General’s report on the dangers of smoking.

Already the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) recommends all adults engage in 30 minutes of moderate physical activity, such as walking, five days a week. It has been proven to lower incidences of major medical problems - not just heart disease, diabetes and obesity, as you might expect, but also depression, dementia, and other serious conditions.

This flurry of attention about walking is more than a flash in the pan. Evidence that millions of Americans are now rediscovering walking to fulfill their transportation, fitness, and recreation needs is as solid as the ground beneath our feet. 

Americans Are Getting Back on their Feet

“Walking is the most common form of physical activity across incomes and ages and education levels,” explained Thomas Schmid of the federal CDC at a conference in Pittsburgh last fall. The CDC’s most recent research shows that the number of Americans who walk for leisure or fitness at least once a week rose to 62% in 2010 from 56% in 2005 - that’s almost 20 million more people on their feet.

Walking is already more prevalent across the United States than most of us realize. Paul Herberling of the U.S. Department of Transportation noted that 10.4% of all trips Americans make are on foot - and 28% of trips under a mile. For young people, it’s 17% of all trips. Americans walk most frequently for exercise, errands, and recreation, according to the National Highway Traffic Safety Administration.

Last year the first ever Walking Summit was held in Washington, D.C., drawing more than 400 people from 41 states and Canada. A second summit is scheduled for October 28-30, 2015, in D.C.

The 2013 summit, which sold out weeks in advance, marked the birth of a new walking movement committed to: encouraging everyone to walk more; and boosting policies, practices, and investments that make communities everywhere more walkable.

It was convened by the Every Body Walk! Collaborative, a joint effort involving more than 100 influential organizations across many fields to promote walking as part of the solution to problems ranging from chronic disease and health care costs, to climate change and the decline of community.

Walking also strengthens our social connections, which have been shown to be as important to health as physical activity, says Kaiser Permanente Vice-President Tyler. The more we are out walking, the more people in our community we come to know.

Americans overwhelmingly view walking as a good thing, according to a national survey . Here’s what it found:

- Good for my health (94 percent)
- Good way to lose weight (91 percent)
- Great way to relax (89 percent)
- Helps reduce anxiety (87 percent)
- Reduces feelings of depression (85 percent) 

Americans Are Voting With Their Feet

Even the American dream is being remodeled to meet the public’s growing enthusiasm for walking. 60% of Americans would prefer to live in neighborhoods with stores and services within easy walking distance, according to a recent survey from the National Association of Realtors - nearly twice as many who want to live where stores can be reached only by car.

This is especially true for the millennial generation, which is now entering the workforce and housing market in large numbers and will shape the future of American life as dramatically as the baby boomers did in the 1960s and 1970s.

“With drastically different views of transportation from those of generations that came before them, millennials are transforming communities,” notes another report from the National Association of Realtors. “Millennials own fewer cars and drive less than their predecessors. They’d rather walk, bike, car-share, and use public transportation - and want to live where that’s all easy.” 

Why Walking? Why Now?

What’s driving the growing passion for walking? “It’s a convergence of factors,” says Christopher Leinberger, a real estate developer, George Washington University business professor, and a leading advocate for walkable communities. Those factors are:

1. The well-established link between walking and better health , which is reinforced by recent research pointing to the dangers of sitting for long periods of time. A comprehensive study published in the Journal of Clinical Nutrition that charts 240,000 Americans between ages 50 and 71 found that “overall [time] sitting was associated with all-cause mortality”.

2. The accelerating costs of owning one, two, or more cars, which many Americans, especially younger people, find a poor investment of their resources. Transportation is now the highest cost in family budgets (19%) next to housing (32%). In auto-dependent communities - where walking is inconvenient and unsafe - transportation costs (25%) approach housing costs (32%).

3. Metropolitan areas with many walkable neighborhoods do better economically than those with just a few. Leinberger’s recent report “ Foot Traffic Ahead“ finds that walkable metropolitan areas “have substantially higher GDPs per capita” and a higher percentage of college graduates. Office space in walkable locations enjoys a 74% rent-per-square-foot premium over offices in auto-oriented developments in America’s 30 largest metropolitan regions.

4. More people discovering the personal satisfactions of walking. “Seeing friends on the street, walking to work, strolling out for dinner or nightlife” are among the pleasures of walking that enrich our lives, says Leinberger. 

Walking Means Business

Firms in the booming tech, information, and creative industries are at the forefront of the trend toward walkable communities because the coveted young talent they need to stay competitive want to work in places that are a short stroll from cafes and cultural attractions.

The first thing Google did after buying the electronics firm Motorola Mobility was to move its headquarters away from the freeways and strip malls of Libertyville, Illinois, to the walkable environs of downtown Chicago.

“They felt like they couldn’t attract the young software engineers they needed” to an isolated 84-acre complex, says Leinberger. Other companies that recently moved from suburban Chicago to the city include Medline, Walgreen’s, Gogo, GE Transportation, Hillshire Brands, and Motorola Solutions.

“Two things seem to resonate for businesses about the importance of walkability - how to attract the best workforce and wanting to locate in communities where health costs are lower,” says Mark Fenton, a former U.S. National Team race walker who now consults on public health planning and transportation. Employees with more opportunities to walk at work and at home are healthier, meaning lower insurance rates for their firms.

From his vantage point at the CDC, Thomas Schmid observes, “If a business is located in a community that is not healthy, they’re paying more to be there. Think of it as a tax or cost of doing business because of health care costs.” One company relocating to Chattanooga, he said, would do so only if a walking and bike trail was extended to their facility. 

The Challenges to a More Walkable America

The walking movement has picked up a lot of momentum in a very short time. “The wind is behind our sails,” says Kate Kraft, a public health expert working with EBWC and America Walks. But she goes on to note that “it took 80 years to make America unwalkable, and it will take a lot of work to make it walkable again.”

Last year’s national survey on attitudes about walking accentuates these challenges. By a huge majority, people say that walking is good for them but admit that they should walk more (79%) and that their children should walk more (73%). Only 11% say they meet the CDC’s recommended daily minimum for walking - half an hour a day, five days a week.

Common reasons cited for not walking are:

- My neighborhood is not very walkable (40 percent)
- Few places within walking distance of my home (40 percent)
- Don’t have time (39 percent)
- Speeding traffic or lack of sidewalks (25 percent)
- Crime in my neighborhood (13 percent) 

Solutions for a More Walkable America

Here are some of the promising developments, strategies, messages, and tools that are now emerging to promote walking:

Vision Zero for Safe Streets: As many as 4,500 Americans are killed crossing the street every year - a tragedy that very few people acknowledge. But there’s hope that will change now that New York City, San Francisco, and other places are implementing Vision Zero campaigns to reduce traffic deaths through street improvements, law enforcement, and public education. Similar policies in Sweden cut pedestrian deaths in half over the past five years - and reduced overall traffic fatalities at the same rate. “Vision Zero is the next big thinking for walking,” says Alliance for Biking & Walking President Jeff Miller.

Federal Action Plan on Pedestrian Safety: New U.S. Secretary of Transportation Anthony Foxx recently announced an all-out effort to apply the department’s resources to boost bike and pedestrian safety the same as they do auto and airline safety. Secretary Foxx - former mayor of Charlotte, North Carolina - notes that pedestrian deaths rose 6% since 2009. “Bicycling and walking is as important as any other form of transportation,” he says.

Safe Routes to Schools: Half of kids under 14 walked or biked to school in 1969. Now it’s less than 15%. Safe Routes to School campaigns work with families, schools, and community officials to identify and eliminate barriers that block kids from getting to school under their own power. “We’re finding that the best interventions include both infrastructure improvements and programming. You put the sidewalks in but also get parents involved,” explains Margo Pedroso, deputy director of the Safe Routes to Schools National Partnership.

Walking as a Basic Human Right: Walking has been shown to optimize our health and strengthen our communities, which means everyone should have equal opportunity to do it. But low-income people often find it difficult or dangerous to take a walk in their neighborhoods, which often lack sidewalks and other basic infrastructure. Studies show that pedestrians in poor neighborhoods are up to four times more likely to be injured in traffic accidents. This theme is now being addressed by many transportation activists and professionals.

Communities for People of All Ages: The mark of a great community is whether you’d feel calm about letting your 80-year-old grandmother or 8-year-old son walk to a nearby park or business district, says Gil Penalosa, former park director of Bogota, explaining why he founded 8-80 Cities. Too many young and old people today live under virtual house arrest, unable to get anywhere on their own because driving is the only way to go.

Complete Streets: The simple idea that all streets should offer safe, convenient, and comfortable travel for everyone - those on foot, on bike, on transit, in wheelchairs, young, old or disabled. Twenty-seven states and 625 local communities across the U.S. have adopted Complete Streets policies in some form.

The Healing Properties of Nature and the Outdoors: Not all exercise offers the same health benefits, according to a growing body of research showing that outdoor physical activity, especially in nature, boosts our health, improves our concentration, and may speed up our natural healing process. A walk in the park is not only more interesting than a workout at the gym, but it may also be healthier too. The Wingspread Declaration - recently signed by 30 of America’s leading health officials, researchers, and non-profit leaders - calls for business, government, and the health care sector to step up efforts to reconnect people with nature.

Walking as a Medical Vital Sign: There’s an initiative afoot among public health advocates to encourage health care professionals to chart their patients’ physical activity the same as they do weight, blood pressure, smoking, and family health. Ascension Health (with 1900 facilities in 23 states), Kaiser Permanente (648 facilities in 9 states), Group Health (25 clinics in Washington state), and Greenville Health System (7 facilities in South Carolina) are among the health providers already doing it.

Walk With a Doc: Walking has the lowest drop-out rate of any physical activity, which is why Ohio cardiologist David Sabgir started Walk With a Doc: to sponsor events in parks and other public places where people can talk to health care professionals while taking a casual walk. Walk With a Doc now operates in 38 states.

Signs of the Times: Many people are so out of practice with walking that they don’t realize how convenient it is. That’s why architecture student Matt Tamasulo posted signs in Raleigh, North Carolina, explaining that key destinations were only a few minutes away by foot. The city soon embraced his guerrilla campaign, and official walkway-finding signs can now be found around town. Tamasulo has launched Walk [Your City] to help other communities show how easy it is to get around on your own power.

Walking is Fun: “Walking is still not seen to be as sexy as biking,” says Robert Ping, program manager for Walking and Livable Communities Institute. “We could focus more on walking as recreation - the stroll through the neighborhood after dinner, going around the block, walking down to the park, meeting your neighbors. Something that’s not only utilitarian and good for the environment, but that’s fun!”

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Jay Walljasper writes, speaks, edits and consults about creating stronger, more vital communities. He is author of The Great Neighborhood Book and All That We Share: A Field Guide to the Commons. He is also a contributor to Sustainable Happiness: Live Simply, Live Well, Make a Difference, from YES! Magazine. His website: JayWalljasper.com.

Lonely Over Christmas: A Snapshot of Social Isolation in the Suburbs

Scorpions and Centaurs/Flickr

by Melanie Davern, University of Melbourne and Lucy Gunn, University of Melbourne

Social isolation and loneliness are becoming common in our large cities.

Our cities are sprawling, housing is becoming more unaffordable, people are travelling further and longer in their cars and household size is shrinking.

These factors all affect our physical and mental health resulting in increasing chronic diseases and often more socially isolated and lonely people.

During the festive season, these problems can be intensified.

So what exactly is social isolation? Socially isolated people don’t have strong social connections or interactions with other people placing them at risk of low self-esteem, higher levels of coronary heart disease, depression, anxiety and below normal levels of happiness or subjective wellbeing.

A community snapshot of metropolitan Melbourne, Melbourne Vital Signs 2014, reveals a number of factors likely to influence social isolation.

The report reveals that in Melbourne one in five households spent more than 30% of their household income on housing. It shows that incidences of family violence have increased by 16% between 2012 and 2013. More than 13% of youth aged 15-19 years are not engaged at all in work or study. Finally, more than 18,500 people are estimated to be homeless in metropolitan Melbourne.

These are just a few of the factors related to where and how people live that contribute to social isolation in the suburbs.

Transport accessibility is another important influence of social isolation. It not only links people to work and study opportunities but also to socially connect with people, linking people to places where social interactions occur.

Getting around is difficult for many people living beyond the transport rich areas of inner city and close to 25% of Melburnians report inconvenience to their daily lives arising from transport, with the oldest and youngest having the most trouble getting around.

Life also becomes more car-dependent in the outer suburbs and a recent local government community survey found that 81% of residents drive to work, leaving little time or energy to connect or volunteer with local community.

Limited transport affects people’s ability to access employment and education opportunities associated with feelings of achievement and productivity and social interactions. More generally, it’s very hard to socialise, build relationships and new networks (needed to get a job) when transport is limited or restricted to car ownership.

So what would the ideal neighbourhood look like if it promoted wellbeing and reduced social isolation?

It would be safe, attractive, socially cohesive and inclusive - and environmentally sustainable. It would include diverse and affordable housing. There would be convenient public transport, walking and cycling infrastructure that was linked to employment, education, public open space, local shops, health and community services, and leisure and cultural opportunities.

It would be a neighbourhood that provides for the needs of all people across the lifespan - children, youth, adults and older adults - embraces diversity and difference, and has active, informed and engaged residents.

Melbourne has been named the world’s most liveable city for the last 4 years. There remain, however, many challenges we need to work at to reduce social isolation in this city and many others across the country.

People need to access services they need within close distance, a “20 minute city” where neighbourhoods have key services available within a 20 minute distance. Higher densities that provide more local employment opportunities and greater services reducing sprawl and helping to connect people to places, and most importantly, more easily to each other.

Social isolation is not an issue specific to the festive season but it can be harder for those people who have few people to connect with. So over the coming weeks, as life becomes busier in the lead up to Christmas and the end of the year, it might also be a good time to reflect on our own lives and think about how we can create more connected and inclusive communities.

It might be as simple as saying “hello” to someone on the train, talking to a neighbour or smiling at someone when you’re shopping or walking in your local area. Think about donating a gift or toy for someone who needs it more than you, volunteering your time like 6 million other Australians, or inviting someone without family or friends to join your Christmas meal.

These might sound like very simple activities - but if everyone put their phone down for a little while maybe we could just bring a little more human kindness to the world and improve social isolation in the suburbs.


This article was originally published on The Conversation. Read the original article.